Changes

It's been a long time since I've blogged regularly. In fact, I completely forgot about this blog. I tried my hand at blogging under my own domain for a few years, but it started stressing me out. I was spending way too much time writing for it and perfecting it and thinking about what to blog next and trying to organize it. And I worried way too much about whether my posts were any good. I missed just blogging for myself because I enjoyed it. I decided to stop paying for it. I've missed blogging and was thrilled to discover my old, FREE blog is still up. So, at least for now, I am going to blog again - just for fun, just a way of journaling for my future self.

I've been thinking about all the changes since my last posts here in 2014:

• Andy retired from the Air Force after 30 years of service and we moved to Pennsylvania. He now works in HR at the Navy Depot.
  
  
• Whitney, John & the grands all moved to Pennsylvania with us! They live about 20 minutes away from us. It's great and we see them often!
  
  
• River and Austen have transformed from toddlers to big kids, and we have 2 more beautiful grandchildren.
  
  
  
  
  
  
  

• We finally bought a house with a swimming pool, something we have always wanted! We love spending our summers grilling out back and cooling off in our pool. We live on a cul-de-sac and have the best neighbors. We all get together often for playing cornhole or watching football. Of course, with the resurgence of stupid COVID right now we haven't been able to do much lately, but hopefully that will change soon.
  
  
  
  
  
  

• AJ graduated from CWU with a degree in business, works a state job and got married! He and his wife Hallie live in Washington.
  
  
• Sky graduated from college with a degree in nursing. She works as an RN in a hospital and  lives with us. She has a serious boyfriend named Patrick who is over here often. We consider him a part of the family.
  
  
• Emma graduated from high school in 2019 and is pursuing a degree in Art Education.
  
  
• My sweet buddy Luke died shortly after we moved here. I was devastated and missed him following me around everywhere. We adopted another goofball golden retriever puppy in December 2016 and named him Sammy. Then around Thanksgiving 2019 we adopted a little pitbull-beagle mix that our friends found wandering around in a Walmart parking lot. We named him Ollie. He is super cute and sweet, but much more serious than Sammy. I totally believe golden retrievers are the goofiest of all dog breeds.
  
  
  
  
  
  
• While Emma was still in high school, I started working in the cafeteria as a bonafide lunch lady! It was a busy job with fun coworkers that kept me moving around. The days went by super fast. But I wanted more freedom so I could travel with Andy when he went on business trips. So I quit, and started volunteering once a week. I got to travel to Hawaii with him and right after we came back COVID happened. So Andy hasn't had any work travel since last February. But Hawaii was AMAZING!!!
  
  
  
  
  
  
• I spent a semester training to become a volunteer CASA (court-appointed special advocate for a foster child) and was certified in December 2016. I have worked on two cases since.
  
  
• Like everyone else, I am sick and tired of COVID. Uggghhh

Bedtime & Birthday

I've been going to bed way too late recently. I do this in waves (fighting my nightowl tendencies). During the summer and early fall, I was actually making myself get into bed no later than 9:00 PM, just reading with a yellow-toned lightbulb in my lamp, and avoiding any electronics. That worked like a charm and I usually fell asleep before 10:00. I would usually wake up naturally at 5:00 AM without even trying. But then Andy and I went to Texas in October for my brother's wedding, and when we got home we had to self-quarantine for 2 weeks. As soon as our 2 weeks was up, the stupid COVID virus got crazy here in Pennsylvania, so we couldn't do anything but stay home to avoid it. Andy was already working from home, and I postponed going back to my volunteer lunch lady job indefinitely. I'm also a CASA volunteer* and have had to visit my foster child and attend court through Zoom for the last 3 months. We have our groceries delivered and shop Amazon Prime. We don't go anywhere. We do go out for daily walks regardless of the weather - it is the only thing keeping me somewhat sane right now. We also attend Sunday mass in the parking lot, streamed through the radio. Father brings the Eucharist out to our car for us. We appreciate him so much. The only people we have really seen since October has been our own kids who live in PA and the grandkids. Being "stuck at home," Andy and I started bingeing on some TV shows: The Walking Dead, Fear the Walking Dead, and Vikings. (I was so surprised how good TWD is, I was not expecting that.) Now after we've gotten everything done for the day, we sit down in the living room by the fireplace and watch these shows until we're all droopy eyed. I've been falling into bed between 11:00 and midnight. It's such a bad habit. So anyway, I'm blaming it on coronavirus. I'm so sick of it.

Yesterday was Andy's birthday and I made carnitas tacos for dinner and celebrated with an easy ice cream cake that I made. I made the pork in the Instant Pot in the morning, shredded it and kept it warm during the day while I got other stuff done. Then I spread it out on a baking sheet and crisped it up under the broiler before serving. It turned out really good!

We eat low-carb most of the time now days, but I'm not so strict that we never eat sugar or carbs on special occasions. I try not to get carried away when we indulge because carbs are so addicting and they make me tired and hungry and fat, so I'm back to normal today. Since Whitney has a newborn, we took the cake over to her house so we could celebrate with the grandkids.

We have 4 grandkids now. River is 11 (how did that even happen), Austen is 9, Chase is 6, and Wilder was born in November.

Then we came home and watched two Vikings shows and went to bed way too late. Again.

*CASA - court-appointed special advocate for a foster child. 

Restless Sleep

I didn't sleep well last night....well, I never seem to sleep well but last night was worse than normal. I kept waking up and having weird dreams that I can't remember. I was hot and kicked off my blankets, then I was cold and shivering, and covered up to my chin. This happened over and over.

But one thing happened that was especially strange and I remember it well. I had a dream in which I started hearing a whooshing sound. I use a fan at night for "white noise," and as I was sleeping, I was aware that I was asleep - or maybe I wasn't? I wondered what the whooshing was, and I could hear it very distinctly over the sound of my fan. Then I heard whispering. It sounded like two people, but I couldn't tell. I couldn't hear what they were saying. I looked across my dark room and saw the curtains part and the outline of faces looking into my room. They appeared to be standing outside my window, and continued whispering. I couldn't hear what they were saying, but their tones seemed mocking toward me. Then I thought, "That can't be real because I'm on the second floor of the house, and anyway, my window is not open so no one can part my curtains like that." I continued to watch them, and started to feel fearful. I knew I was dreaming but I was very aware of it. It was like I was awake yet dreaming at the same time. I tried to call out, "Who are you? What do you want?" But I was paralyzed. I couldn't make a sound and could not open my mouth to speak. I tried to open my eyes and I couldn't move. I don't know how long I lay there trying to open my eyes and mouth and couldn't budge, but it seemed like a long time. Finally I managed to slowly open my eyes. Everything was normal. The curtains were closed and I only heard the sound of my fan. I looked at the clock and it was just a few minutes past 3:00 AM. 

I don't know what to make of it all. Usually I forget my dreams by the time morning comes, but this one remains very clear in my mind.